Mom truths

So remember my most recent post (you can find it here) about time being a thief and wishing I could soak up every moment of my kids childhood. Well this week I take it back.  I think this picture of Rhett describes my feelings exactly.

Overall I have really enjoyed summer break.  We have had lots of quality time together.  Read LOTS too much time together.  I think there is a good reason why we aren't normally together all the time.  Just as much as I need a break from my children, they need a break from me, and each other.  The fighting has increased a billion percent and it seems like we aren't even awake for a few minutes before my big kids are arguing and someone ends up crying.  Throw in twin toddlers who are either getting into everything, screaming mom every 5 minutes, and the big kids antagonizing them.... well you get the picture.

Isn't it funny the emotions you go through as a parent?  You can have such an immense love for your children and also be counting the minutes until bedtime all in the same hour.  You can go from wanting to spend every minute with them and taking them to do all the fun things, and also be hiding in the closet just trying to enjoy a minute of peace. Parenthood is full of so many emotions. So so many. And you know what, that's okay.

Just because I need a break from my children doesn't make me a bad mom.  Actually in my case, it makes me a better mom.  Ever hear the phrase "distance makes the heart grow fonder?" Well it applies to children as well.  When I get a break, I have more patience, I am less exhausted, and I am a better mom for it.  Even a short break makes all the difference.

We only have a few more days before my big kids are back in school and we go back to a normal routine, and I may be counting down the days.  Does that make me a bad mom? I don't think so. Trust me, I'm sure after a week or two of them in school I'll be wishing they were home again.  And that is the irony of motherhood.

Time is a thief...

Does anyone else feel like January 1st was just yesterday?  What the heck happened to this year? I cannot believe we are already in July, and in a short 6 months we will be in the year 2020.  My mind is blown!

Time is such a crazy thing.  Sometimes I want to speed it up and sometimes I want it to slow down.  Recently I have been trying better to live in each day, in each moment, instead of wishing time would slow down or fly by.  

It can be so hard to try to make every moment count.  I will be the first to admit that I can get caught up in the social media hole, or getting mindlessly caught up in whatever TV show I am watching.  But as my kids get older it makes me sad to think that soon enough they will be out of my house and all of these moments I could have been doing a better job.  I want my kids to remember that I tried my best, had fun with them, but also encouraged them to have fun on their own.  I want to remember the fun times we had, and also the simple quiet moments of movie watching as a family, or eating dinner together.  

It seems like the older I get the faster time goes.  I don't know if there is a correlation because I am busier and most days just trying to stay afloat.  Or if time is playing a trick on me.  But either way I don't like it.  

Being present.  It can be so.dang.hard.

I recently took a trip to Utah and told myself I would try harder to put my phone away.  It was so refreshing to spend time with my grandma, to just listen to her stories and take it all in.  I don't know how many more years we will have together, nobody really knows how much time they have left on this earth.  It is so important, to be present, ask questions, take it all in.  I am so glad that I made a more conscious effort and it truly made a difference.

What are some ways you stay present and enjoy the little moments?  I would love any ideas that you have.